Dear red audi a4,

Good job cutting off another driver to merge into the right lane and accelerate past me, all while ignoring the pedestrian that was trying to cross. Sorry that the right lane turns into a right turn only lane, but no, I don't plan on letting you back in before the light.

Sincerely,
-Quit trying to show off on campus.

 

Dear Mitsubishi Lancer driver. Why spend all your money on a Lancer and try to make it look like an Evo when you should have bought a straight up Evo. Either way stop egging me on to race you, I'm not interested.

 

Dear brodawg,

Thanks for driving 35+mph through the parking lot, that's smart. Glad you bottomed your civic on the speedbump though.

Sincerely,
-Laughing at your poor car's underbody.

 

Dear dipshit,

My hot rod is 90+ years old with brakes made in the 30's, for the love of god why in the world would you cut in front of me and slam on your brakes so that your brood of children can see it.

 

Dear awful driver,
When 5 or more cars are behind you, it doesn't mean you are the engine.
Also, it's a shame you can't channel vibrations, you would pull over to let them all pass.

 

Dear pillock,

You are driving a rusted mid-90s Sentra on three doughnuts. I am driving a lifted Ford F-series. You cut in front of me and thought it would be cool to brake check me, flipping me off through your window. Next time I see you I will use you as a speedbump. You have been warned.

 

Dear Utah tourist,

After reading your map, making a U-turn from the curb, and cross over three lanes you hit me. And for you claiming it wasn't your fault, go f*k yourself.

 

You have my given permission to exterminate them

 

Dear idiot driver,

When I confront you for throwing your cigarette butt out the window, don't just give me a dumb look while you chew your food like a cow chewing its cud... PICK UP THE ****ING BUTT. My wife suggested next time I pick it up and put it on his lap.

I suggested she act like she's fixing our (not-quite-here-yet) baby while I shoot him twice in the face with a suppressed pistol.

And DchaMD - you get neg rep for being a bitchy, elitist ****.

I love how the "C word" isn't edited here... LOL

 

Life is way too short to let something like that get your goat bro! Just realize karma is a bitch and keep living the good life